The things they don't tell you about raising kids in Norway

Food - or the lack of it - at schools and kindergartens

Several foreigners, particularly those from Mediterranean countries, complained that kindergartens and schools in Norway did not supply hot meals and that both the packed lunches Norwegian parents gave their children and the snacks provided at school were surprisingly unhealthy. 

"One of the richest countries in the world does not ensure nutrition at schools," said Ana from Portugal. "Schools have no kitchens. The most you can do is pre-order chocolate milk. Kids often eat a slice of bread with cheese, cucumber and chocolate milk for lunch."

"Food in barnehager is bad," agreed Marcos from Madrid. "They get all kinds of ultra-processed foods like baconost, prim, etc. It's ok to eat those things once in a while, but it shouldn't be offered to children every single day." 

Ralu from Romania said it had shocked her that "food in tubes", "full of sugar and salt", were given to babies and toddlers at kindergartens. 

Birthday party etiquette 

Are you looking forward to inviting the new friends your child has made at school or kindergarten over for their birthday party? Well, think again. In Norway, you generally have to invite the entire class, or failing that, all the children of your own child’s gender. 

“This is one of those unwritten rules that I should have been warned about before being lynched by angry parents,” Ana, from Portugal, said. “I ended up fighting with a couple of parents when I asked my kid to choose ten children, both from in and outside the school, for her 10th birthday, which apparently was very rude.” 

She was particularly surprised by the convention of all-boy or all-girl parties. “I mean, aren’t we trying to be a less sexist society here?” 

Michelle, from Canada, was also surprised to attend a meeting at school where parents were expected to come to a collective decision on whether the children would invite all children in their class, or only boys or girls.

“It seemed very weird to me that the kid wouldn’t just invite his or her friends!?” she said. 

Lu, from Spain, however, said he had grown to appreciate the unfussy approach to children’s birthdays.  

“Birthdays and other kids’ events are very simple. No overdoing it, paraphernalia, or excessive decorations; the kids - at least these ages - enjoy the same things every time: pølse [hotdogs] and sjokoladekake [chocolate cake] and saft [squash]. Maybe a piñata and some candy in a plastic bag at the end.” 

Children don't learn very much 

While everyone celebrates Norway's play-based pedagogical approach, some foreigners don't come prepared for the flip side: that their children don't do much in the way of rote learning.

"Kids hardly learn anything at school. A German third grader has gone through more grammar than a Norwegian middle schooler," complained Katrin from Germany.

Michelle, from Canada, worried about "the extremely short school day, in which they mostly seem to watch movies".
"I do like the focus on outside time and social development, but I think there could be a better balance between that and, you know, actually learning stuff."

Lack of discipline 

Some foreigners also complained of a lack of discipline and a surprising amount of bullying.

"Kids don't learn to respect teachers, or adults in general. They are not taught to not constantly scream instead of speaking. Most adults are screaming instead of speaking," said Katrin from Germany.

"Some parents and educators allow children to walk over them, and it can get really bad towards middle school," agreed Maggie from Bulgaria.

Freedom, friluftsliv and a relaxed attitude to safety 

One thing foreigners appreciated was the freedom given to children, as well as the amount of time they spent outdoors.

"Parents are not hysterical about keeping their children or their hands clean like some foreigners," said Maggie from Bulgaria. "When they are outside, kids are free to experience nature with all their senses, and no one has qualms about getting wet, dirty or muddy. Also, babies sleeping outside in freezing temperature." 

"I was shocked at the level of freedom young kids have, while at the same time how safe everyone is," agreed Ashley from the US. "I've been here for five years, work in a kindergarten even, and it still shocks me to see groups of four and five year olds hopping on a train in Olso with their matching vests and teachers. That level of freedom and trust is unheard of in the US."

While most foreigners knew enough about Norway not to be surprised at the time children spend time outside, some were surprised at how much was expected of them. 

"Activities such as hiking are integrated in the children’s lives from an early age," reported Lena from Germany. "For example the oldest group in kindergarten - children of about five years old - hiked up Ulriken [a mountain in Bergen], which is 643m above sea level.

One thing that foreigners were less sure of, however, was the tradition of giving six and seven-year-olds knives. 

"Mine made their own when they were seven years old, which I thought was both cool and terrifying," said Yana from Russia. "In general, the difference in focus on physical safety in kindergartens and schools is major. No suing for negligence in case your Johnny fell off a tree while playing unsupervised. Let kids be kids would be the answer."

Jenni from the UK said she had been surprised to be told that allowing her six year old to handle a knife in ihs scout group would help him learn that "they are tools and not weapons". 

Good luck getting antibiotics 

Many foreign parents expressed frustration at the way doctors in Norway handle children.

"Many parents experience culture shocks at their local health centres," explained Maggie. "Doctors do not offer any medications for the kids unless there are clear indications that there is a bacterial infection. They also do not recommend over-the-counter medications unless you specifically ask about it."

"The only thing they recommend is paracetamol. High doses," complained Katrin from Germany. "Everything paracetamol doesn't cure is incurable."